Wow.
What a waste of 82 + 7 games.
3-2 lead with ONE minute left in the third and we let them score 2.
That's fantastic.
Eric Staal, I have not only lost all of my love for you but I wholeheartedly wish bad things on you and your brothers.
You like Timmy Gleason's dick (Though he was the one who made that 'ON-HIS-KNEES' pass...surprising, eh?), Cam Ward's a Nazi and BabSUCK kills puppies.
Any questions? Why don't you ask your coach; Hitler.
Wasted playoff beards.
Wasted towels.
Wasted effort.
Wasted angst.
We lost Salvy and injured Jamie.
Shanny took a puck to the mouth and spit gallons of blood.
Zachy took a stick to the face and split his cheek open.
Salvy took a puck to the face and kept playing.
We tried so hard all season long,
We even made it past MB30's injury.
Whatever.
Wasted.
The Devils will always be my team, no matter what.
Next year, boys. Next year.
1. KEVIN WEEKES.
5. COLIN WHITE.
6. ANDY GREENE.
7. PAUL MARTIN.
8. DAINIUS ZUBRUS.
9. ZACH PARISE.
11. JOHN MADDEN.
12. BRIAN ROLSTON.
14. BRIAN GIONTA.
15. JAMIE LANGENBRUNNER. “C”
16. BOBBY HOLIK.
17. MIKE RUPP.
18. BRENDAN SHANNAHAN.
19. TRAVIS ZAJAC.
20. JAY PANDOLFO.
23. DAVID CLARKSON.
24. BRYCE SALVADOR.
26. PATRIK ELIAS.
27. MIKE MOTTAU.
28. NICLAS HAVELID.
29. JOHNNY ODUYA.
30. MARTIN BRODEUR.
Great season.
Good series.
Amazing players.
Bad luck.
Awful timing.
Don’t feel sad, Jamie.
Everyone in New Jersey feels the same way.
And we still love you.
All of you.
Tuesday, April 28, 2009
"Yeah, when you put it in story form, it really does sound bad."
Some funny events happened this last week. They might be 'you-had-to-be-there' moments but regardless, I want to blog them because it's 86 degrees in my house and we're out of microwavable Bagel Bites so I have the freaking OVEN on to bake chicken-strips.
Anyways, I was at the movies with my fellow bloggers, Sam and Christopher to see 'Obsessed' on Saturday (For the record, despite the prescene of super-actress, Ali Larter, the movie sucked and isn't woth the 8$ I spent on a ticket, the 5$ on the MEGA-soda and the 2$ I spent on Guitar Hero and Air Hockey). During the previews, they were advertising for some new movie that I don't rember the name of. The green screen came up saying 'The following movie is rated PG-13 for sexual content and language'. Jokingly, I remarked 'Wow, that's a good movie already'. As if scripted for an amusing joke, the words 'STARRING; KATHERINE HEIGL' flashed across the big screen, followed by a clip of the actress. I sighed loudly as Sam and Christopher burst into hysterics. I love my friends.
Also, during today's lunch period, my good buddy Drew sat next to me, plopping his bagged lunch on the table.
"Dude," He said. "When I was leaving gym today, there were these two really hot chicks in the hallway and they were holding hands and touching each others legs! It was amazing!"
"That's nice, man." I said as he gave me the Chocolate Drizzled Rice Krispy Treat from his bag. "But I really don't care about two chicks you saw." I took a bite of the awesome snack that Drew had given me. Rice Kispy Treats are fantastic.
"DUDE!" He yelled, "THEY WERE HOT LESBIANS! I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THEY EXISTED IN REAL LIFE!!" I sighed.
"Classy, man." I said, slapping him upside the head.
"What was I supposed to do?! They were walking in front of me!"
"Cover your eyes?" I suggested.
"HELL NO!"
When mild-mannered, all-too-innocent, super-sweet, never-ever-makes-inappropriate-remarks Jimmy came over to our table, Drew explained the story to him. After a long pause, Jimmy nodded.
"I thought they only existed in fairy tales."
I love my friends.
Even the idiots.
They're all idiots.
Anyways, I was at the movies with my fellow bloggers, Sam and Christopher to see 'Obsessed' on Saturday (For the record, despite the prescene of super-actress, Ali Larter, the movie sucked and isn't woth the 8$ I spent on a ticket, the 5$ on the MEGA-soda and the 2$ I spent on Guitar Hero and Air Hockey). During the previews, they were advertising for some new movie that I don't rember the name of. The green screen came up saying 'The following movie is rated PG-13 for sexual content and language'. Jokingly, I remarked 'Wow, that's a good movie already'. As if scripted for an amusing joke, the words 'STARRING; KATHERINE HEIGL' flashed across the big screen, followed by a clip of the actress. I sighed loudly as Sam and Christopher burst into hysterics. I love my friends.
Also, during today's lunch period, my good buddy Drew sat next to me, plopping his bagged lunch on the table.
"Dude," He said. "When I was leaving gym today, there were these two really hot chicks in the hallway and they were holding hands and touching each others legs! It was amazing!"
"That's nice, man." I said as he gave me the Chocolate Drizzled Rice Krispy Treat from his bag. "But I really don't care about two chicks you saw." I took a bite of the awesome snack that Drew had given me. Rice Kispy Treats are fantastic.
"DUDE!" He yelled, "THEY WERE HOT LESBIANS! I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW THEY EXISTED IN REAL LIFE!!" I sighed.
"Classy, man." I said, slapping him upside the head.
"What was I supposed to do?! They were walking in front of me!"
"Cover your eyes?" I suggested.
"HELL NO!"
When mild-mannered, all-too-innocent, super-sweet, never-ever-makes-inappropriate-remarks Jimmy came over to our table, Drew explained the story to him. After a long pause, Jimmy nodded.
"I thought they only existed in fairy tales."
I love my friends.
Even the idiots.
They're all idiots.
Thursday, April 23, 2009
Devils Poetry.
MB30 is fantastic,
Marty's simply automatic,
Greenie's beard is kind of spastic,
But Clarky scored and that is TACTIC!
MB30 plays it cool,
And Eric Staal looks a fool,
Cam Ward just got schooled,
And Babchuk's scratched 'cause he's a tool.
Shanny's beard is looking grey,
But we still love him anyway.
Clarky hasn't fought today,
And that 'Cane ruined Mike Rupp's break away.
I like that we're having some good luck,
Cane's wish they hadn't scratched Babchuk,
Gio falls down and gets stuck,
The crowd just whistled 'Rangers Suck'.
Colin White got a penalty,
Which doesn't seem real fair to me.
Eric Staal is mad whiny,
But a great save #30.
2nd period comes to an end.
Can we win it? Yes we can.
We scored 1 goal; let's score 10!
Eric Staal is not our friend.
Marty's simply automatic,
Greenie's beard is kind of spastic,
But Clarky scored and that is TACTIC!
MB30 plays it cool,
And Eric Staal looks a fool,
Cam Ward just got schooled,
And Babchuk's scratched 'cause he's a tool.
Shanny's beard is looking grey,
But we still love him anyway.
Clarky hasn't fought today,
And that 'Cane ruined Mike Rupp's break away.
I like that we're having some good luck,
Cane's wish they hadn't scratched Babchuk,
Gio falls down and gets stuck,
The crowd just whistled 'Rangers Suck'.
Colin White got a penalty,
Which doesn't seem real fair to me.
Eric Staal is mad whiny,
But a great save #30.
2nd period comes to an end.
Can we win it? Yes we can.
We scored 1 goal; let's score 10!
Eric Staal is not our friend.
Game 5
Just some quick things to say;
1. Jamie Langenbrunner...COME BACK.
2. If anyone so much as pokes MB30, I WANT TO SEE A PENALTY.
3. Carolina scratched Babcuk? (Babchuck? Babsuck? I don't know how to spell it)
4. I want to see Johnny Madden punch Eric Staal in the throat.
5. I want to see David Clarky step on Cam Ward's head.
6. Welcome back, Andy Greene!
7. Brian Rolston is not a great replacement for Captain Langs.
8. Show more of Johnny Oduya's epic playoff beard.
9. Someone give Zachy Boy some steroids so he can grow a beard. He looks 10.
10. RANGERS SUCK. (I just heard the whistle ^__^)
That is all.
I'm TiVoing the game so I can watch 'Grey's Anatomy' at 9:00.
Go Devils.
1. Jamie Langenbrunner...COME BACK.
2. If anyone so much as pokes MB30, I WANT TO SEE A PENALTY.
3. Carolina scratched Babcuk? (Babchuck? Babsuck? I don't know how to spell it)
4. I want to see Johnny Madden punch Eric Staal in the throat.
5. I want to see David Clarky step on Cam Ward's head.
6. Welcome back, Andy Greene!
7. Brian Rolston is not a great replacement for Captain Langs.
8. Show more of Johnny Oduya's epic playoff beard.
9. Someone give Zachy Boy some steroids so he can grow a beard. He looks 10.
10. RANGERS SUCK. (I just heard the whistle ^__^)
That is all.
I'm TiVoing the game so I can watch 'Grey's Anatomy' at 9:00.
Go Devils.
Tuesday, April 21, 2009
RANT.
Alright, so apparently the Carolina Hurricanes fans and officials are too busy having sex with their first cousins and drinking Budweiser and watching NASCAR to understand the rules of hockey. SO TO THE 'CANES OFFICIALS; WHEN THE GAME IS TIED 3-3 (after the Devils worked so freaking hard to tie it up, mind you.) AND THERE IS 0.5 SECONDS LEFT AND SOMEONE NAILS YOUR GOALIE (GOALIE INTERFERENCE, you assholes) AND THE 'CANES SCORE WITH 0.2 SECONDS LEFT IN THE GAME, IT IS NOT A GOAL. Seriously? Do you not understand the sport you play and officiate or are you just really, really fucking retarded? I've never seen Martin Brodeur be so angry, nor have I really seen anyone so angry (except for maybe every hockey fan in New Jersey who simultaneously wished death upon everyone in Raleigh) in my entire life. If you manage to piss off the calm, cool and collective Martin Brodeur, you screwed up.
Also, you unclassy, redneck, abomination Hurricane 'fans' who decided to throw shit at Martin Brodeur as he left the ice, just hang yourself. You're a disgrace to the game of hockey and you are just a waste of life. No one loves you and if I ever meet you in person, I will pull out your eyes and make you eat them. Learn to have some class and some respect, you queers.
As for the officials and refs, you are an even bigger disgrace to the game of hockey and you make all of us in New Jersey sick. You can't call worth shit, you don't understand the rules of the game and you can't even perform SIMPLE TASKS that your job requires. Really? Everyone in North and South Carolina can suck it because the boys in black and red will be back Thursday to kick your sorry asses and make you wish you didn't get the 6th seed.
Also, you unclassy, redneck, abomination Hurricane 'fans' who decided to throw shit at Martin Brodeur as he left the ice, just hang yourself. You're a disgrace to the game of hockey and you are just a waste of life. No one loves you and if I ever meet you in person, I will pull out your eyes and make you eat them. Learn to have some class and some respect, you queers.
As for the officials and refs, you are an even bigger disgrace to the game of hockey and you make all of us in New Jersey sick. You can't call worth shit, you don't understand the rules of the game and you can't even perform SIMPLE TASKS that your job requires. Really? Everyone in North and South Carolina can suck it because the boys in black and red will be back Thursday to kick your sorry asses and make you wish you didn't get the 6th seed.
Devils;
Dearest Devils,
EPIC!!
Thank you, David Clarkson.
We tied it up.
Please score; I hate playoff OT.
LOVE YOU!!
- Kristyn.
EPIC!!
Thank you, David Clarkson.
We tied it up.
Please score; I hate playoff OT.
LOVE YOU!!
- Kristyn.
Sunday, April 19, 2009
Devils @ Hurricanes 4/19/09
7:30 – A glimpse of Captain Langs leaving the bench in one of the clips on the recap. No footage of the injury though.
7:32 - A clip of Jamie taking a slap shot. That’s the injury? WTF Jamie.
7:35 – Hurricanes fans are freakin’ loud. Shut up. You don’t even have ice in Carolina! (thank you drunk Devils fan from Friday).
7:39 – A little girl is singing the National Anthem. Somehow, I really could care less about a little Canes fan! Boo you, child!
7:40 – The puck drops in Raleigh! Also, Jay Pando’s got a nice playoff beard going.
7:41 – The Hurricane fans are annoying me. We’re only 75 seconds in and I think they oughta shut the hell up. Oh, yes, playoffs make me bitter.
7:41 – Brian Gionta takes a sharp angle shot from the middle of nowhere. He made that exact same shot five times on Friday. Also, the new ZZPOP line is out. It’s kind of ZZROL now since it’s Rolston instead of Pop Langs.
7:43 – Rolston fires one. Misses. The puck comes back down to MB30. A scary wrap-around attempt ensues but thanks to the 35 Devils that seem to be standing in front of the net stop it.
7:44 – Mike Rupp; another one sporting some playoff stubble.
7:45 – ‘Canes fans go wild over NOTHING. They think it’s a penalty so they cheer. How gay.
7:46 – MB30! Now that’s how you stop a puck! Why don’t you do that more often?!
7:47 – You know, normally, when I have my head down and looking at the screen, the crowd is helpful because they cheer at approptiate times, like when there’s a breakaway or a fight or something. But with this bunch of retards, it’s like ‘YAAAYY! CANES BREAK AWAY!. YAAAY!! ERIC STAAL’S SHOOTING! YAAAY ERIC’S DRINKING WATER!!! YAAY, I SEE A BUG!!’
7:48 – ZACHARY PARISE! 3rd goal of the playoffs! Jeez, man.
7:49 – BOO! CANES, YOU SUCK! 1-1.
7:51 – Brian NotSoGiant-a tries to play defense but gets twisted like a mini-pretzel.
7:52 – The Hurricanes announcer is louder than the Devils one.
7:53 – Is anyone else sick of the ‘Technologic’ commercial for Lincoln?
7:56 – Babchuck takes a shot. OHSHIT. Bryce Salvador is down…a lot of blood. Puck to the face? SHIT. BAD. NOT GOOD. He isn’t getting up…oh, Lord. Never ever good. Bryce is not leaving. He is on the bench, towel to the face, rocking back in forth in pain but staying in. God, I love him.
8:01 – Johnny Oduya (my favorite playoff beard from last year) takes a one-timer. Misses wide. Takes a second try. Cam Ward, you suck. More shots. Lots of shots actually. 50 seconds…hurry, Devils. Hugely open net shot but no one there to take it, since it’s a rebound.
8:02 – Staal boy toe-drags and makes an attempt but shoots too high. SIGHS. Power play (the four-minute one) is over.
8:03 – You have no idea how much I want to stuff those playoff towels down the throats of all those Canes fans.
8:07 – A fight that could’ve been. My favorite little pest David Clarkson and some random Cane jackass corner each other but don’t drop the gloves fast enough and it’s broken up by the refs.
8:10 – Penalty to Rob Brinda’gay. Hooking. Silly Cane.
8:12 – That’s right Devils…keep letting the Canes clear it out. I’m sure the puck will send itself into the net.
8:14 – I don’t understand it. We are a good team but as soon as we go on the Power Play, we turn into a bunch of incompetent baboons on ice skates! MB30 ends up playing the puck for 80% of the PP because all they do is clear it out,
8:16 – GIO!! LITTLE GIONTA SCORES WITH 8.6 SECONDS LEFT IN THE PERIOD! WHO SAID ONLY BIG GUYS SCORE?!
8:17 – And the first period ends. Ha, sure shut up those jerkface Canes fans!
8:35 – We’re back. Mad Dog takes a penalty. Failure.
8:38 – Mike Mottau gets crunched.
8:43 – Paul Martin’s a fast skater, despite the fact that he got splattered.
8:47 – Dainius Zubrus gets a penalty because pretty boy Staal punched him in the face. That makes sense.
8:48 – Thank you frantic, make-shift, totally spazzy, completely unorganized Devils defense.
8:52 – Stuff happens. I’m not really sure what, though.
8:54 – Bobby Holik gets a penalty. Boo. Why does he do things like this?
8:58 – Keep it up, MB30.
8:58 – DAMN YOU, PENALTIES. Paul Martin takes a penalty. 5-on-3. GULP.
9:02 – AGGGGGHHHH!!! 2-2.
9:06 – PP. PP. PP. PP = LOVE. (And our very unorganized power play).
9:10 – Staal VS MB30. They both take penalties.
9:13 – Period 2 over. Be back in 17 minutes.
9:32 – And we’re back.
9:34 – Staal and Zubrus are released from their pens.
9:35 – Colin White hits Staal boy in his head. xD
9:36 – I’m getting a little anxious with this game.
9:38 – A ‘Cane loses his edge and wipes out so Johnny O does what he’s supposed to and pokes him and the ribs a dozen times with his stick.
9:40 – Holy mother of God that was close. The Canes almost made it 3-2 but luckily, their rebound retrieval skills are worse than ours.
9:40 – GIONTA, STOP WITH THE SHARP-ANGLE SHOTS. You can score straight on, bud.
9:45 – SIGH. Colin White. Roughing.
9:47 – Save by MB30. Sigh. I really don’t want to do overtime again.
9:51 – Bleh.
9:56 – Just BLEH. Frantic hockey. We just hurt a Cane, too.
9:57 – Bryce Salvador is still a badass. Took a puck to the face (or a stick?) and played through the pain. Love him.
10:03 – Sheesh, almost got the go-ahead goal there but MB30 has us saved.
10:05 – MSG turns gay and freezes.
10:07 – AGH. The stress and the suspense and the chaos is killing me.
10:09 – Overtime…time.
10:29 – TRAAAAVISSS ZAAAJAACCC!! DEVILS WIN!! ZACH PARISE DOES HIS NORMAL JUMPY HUG ON ZAJAC AND THE TEAM GOES CRAZY, SHUTTING UP THOSE ANNOYING CAROLINA FANS!! FINAL SCORE: 3-2. NOW WE LEAD THE SERIES 2-1!
7:32 - A clip of Jamie taking a slap shot. That’s the injury? WTF Jamie.
7:35 – Hurricanes fans are freakin’ loud. Shut up. You don’t even have ice in Carolina! (thank you drunk Devils fan from Friday).
7:39 – A little girl is singing the National Anthem. Somehow, I really could care less about a little Canes fan! Boo you, child!
7:40 – The puck drops in Raleigh! Also, Jay Pando’s got a nice playoff beard going.
7:41 – The Hurricane fans are annoying me. We’re only 75 seconds in and I think they oughta shut the hell up. Oh, yes, playoffs make me bitter.
7:41 – Brian Gionta takes a sharp angle shot from the middle of nowhere. He made that exact same shot five times on Friday. Also, the new ZZPOP line is out. It’s kind of ZZROL now since it’s Rolston instead of Pop Langs.
7:43 – Rolston fires one. Misses. The puck comes back down to MB30. A scary wrap-around attempt ensues but thanks to the 35 Devils that seem to be standing in front of the net stop it.
7:44 – Mike Rupp; another one sporting some playoff stubble.
7:45 – ‘Canes fans go wild over NOTHING. They think it’s a penalty so they cheer. How gay.
7:46 – MB30! Now that’s how you stop a puck! Why don’t you do that more often?!
7:47 – You know, normally, when I have my head down and looking at the screen, the crowd is helpful because they cheer at approptiate times, like when there’s a breakaway or a fight or something. But with this bunch of retards, it’s like ‘YAAAYY! CANES BREAK AWAY!. YAAAY!! ERIC STAAL’S SHOOTING! YAAAY ERIC’S DRINKING WATER!!! YAAY, I SEE A BUG!!’
7:48 – ZACHARY PARISE! 3rd goal of the playoffs! Jeez, man.
7:49 – BOO! CANES, YOU SUCK! 1-1.
7:51 – Brian NotSoGiant-a tries to play defense but gets twisted like a mini-pretzel.
7:52 – The Hurricanes announcer is louder than the Devils one.
7:53 – Is anyone else sick of the ‘Technologic’ commercial for Lincoln?
7:56 – Babchuck takes a shot. OHSHIT. Bryce Salvador is down…a lot of blood. Puck to the face? SHIT. BAD. NOT GOOD. He isn’t getting up…oh, Lord. Never ever good. Bryce is not leaving. He is on the bench, towel to the face, rocking back in forth in pain but staying in. God, I love him.
8:01 – Johnny Oduya (my favorite playoff beard from last year) takes a one-timer. Misses wide. Takes a second try. Cam Ward, you suck. More shots. Lots of shots actually. 50 seconds…hurry, Devils. Hugely open net shot but no one there to take it, since it’s a rebound.
8:02 – Staal boy toe-drags and makes an attempt but shoots too high. SIGHS. Power play (the four-minute one) is over.
8:03 – You have no idea how much I want to stuff those playoff towels down the throats of all those Canes fans.
8:07 – A fight that could’ve been. My favorite little pest David Clarkson and some random Cane jackass corner each other but don’t drop the gloves fast enough and it’s broken up by the refs.
8:10 – Penalty to Rob Brinda’gay. Hooking. Silly Cane.
8:12 – That’s right Devils…keep letting the Canes clear it out. I’m sure the puck will send itself into the net.
8:14 – I don’t understand it. We are a good team but as soon as we go on the Power Play, we turn into a bunch of incompetent baboons on ice skates! MB30 ends up playing the puck for 80% of the PP because all they do is clear it out,
8:16 – GIO!! LITTLE GIONTA SCORES WITH 8.6 SECONDS LEFT IN THE PERIOD! WHO SAID ONLY BIG GUYS SCORE?!
8:17 – And the first period ends. Ha, sure shut up those jerkface Canes fans!
8:35 – We’re back. Mad Dog takes a penalty. Failure.
8:38 – Mike Mottau gets crunched.
8:43 – Paul Martin’s a fast skater, despite the fact that he got splattered.
8:47 – Dainius Zubrus gets a penalty because pretty boy Staal punched him in the face. That makes sense.
8:48 – Thank you frantic, make-shift, totally spazzy, completely unorganized Devils defense.
8:52 – Stuff happens. I’m not really sure what, though.
8:54 – Bobby Holik gets a penalty. Boo. Why does he do things like this?
8:58 – Keep it up, MB30.
8:58 – DAMN YOU, PENALTIES. Paul Martin takes a penalty. 5-on-3. GULP.
9:02 – AGGGGGHHHH!!! 2-2.
9:06 – PP. PP. PP. PP = LOVE. (And our very unorganized power play).
9:10 – Staal VS MB30. They both take penalties.
9:13 – Period 2 over. Be back in 17 minutes.
9:32 – And we’re back.
9:34 – Staal and Zubrus are released from their pens.
9:35 – Colin White hits Staal boy in his head. xD
9:36 – I’m getting a little anxious with this game.
9:38 – A ‘Cane loses his edge and wipes out so Johnny O does what he’s supposed to and pokes him and the ribs a dozen times with his stick.
9:40 – Holy mother of God that was close. The Canes almost made it 3-2 but luckily, their rebound retrieval skills are worse than ours.
9:40 – GIONTA, STOP WITH THE SHARP-ANGLE SHOTS. You can score straight on, bud.
9:45 – SIGH. Colin White. Roughing.
9:47 – Save by MB30. Sigh. I really don’t want to do overtime again.
9:51 – Bleh.
9:56 – Just BLEH. Frantic hockey. We just hurt a Cane, too.
9:57 – Bryce Salvador is still a badass. Took a puck to the face (or a stick?) and played through the pain. Love him.
10:03 – Sheesh, almost got the go-ahead goal there but MB30 has us saved.
10:05 – MSG turns gay and freezes.
10:07 – AGH. The stress and the suspense and the chaos is killing me.
10:09 – Overtime…time.
10:29 – TRAAAAVISSS ZAAAJAACCC!! DEVILS WIN!! ZACH PARISE DOES HIS NORMAL JUMPY HUG ON ZAJAC AND THE TEAM GOES CRAZY, SHUTTING UP THOSE ANNOYING CAROLINA FANS!! FINAL SCORE: 3-2. NOW WE LEAD THE SERIES 2-1!
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